What To Say To People Who Ask How You’re Doing

You could go the sarcastic route: “Livin’ the dream.”

Or you could go with the stoic response: “Controlling the controllables.”

Or you could just lie: “Great.”

Or you could sit down and fill out this short fill-in-the-blank list and take your answer from something you write down here. 

This list comes from a cool workbook called: “It’s Currently 2021: A Self Reflection Workbook by Tracy Benjamin. Tracy Benjamin blogs as Shutterbean. The best part of this workbook for me is this nine point monthly inventory. Here it is:

Month: ________

Inspired by:

Watching: 

Reading:

Thinking about:

Listening to:

Dreamlife:

Researching:

Eating and Drinking:

Grateful for:

I recommend you copy and paste this list into the Notes app on your phone and fill it out at least once a month. That’s what I do. 

Then, when someone asks you how you’re doing (and really wants to know) you could tell them what you’ve been feeling grateful for, or about something you’ve been watching on Netflix, or you might even confess your food sins to them.

I think it’s particularly important now, during this pandemic, for us to keep authentic, deep connections with one another. 

Telling someone who really cares about you that you’re just “okay” or “fine” doesn’t cut it. It puts up a wall, actually. 

So get in the habit of visiting this list. It will keep top-of-mind for you all the most important things.

It will help you track your life.

Especially now, when every day feels like Blursday. 

I don’t know about you, but if I don’t find a way of periodically recording what I’m doing and feeling, I lose my place in my life: Where was I? What chapter am I on? What did I do yesterday? 

Here’s how I filled out this list a few days ago:

Inspired by: Nothing

Watching: Catastrophe on Netflix, birds at the feeder, the progression of the amaryllis blossoms.

Reading: Wintering, The Practice, The Wild Robot

Thinking about: Insurrection, Biden, the vaccine

Listening to: Podcasts mainly: Morning Joe, The Daily, and Making Sense with Sam Harris

Dreamlife: Can’t remember them, but I am dreaming

Researching: Nothing

Eating and Drinking: Carbs and wine

Grateful for: G and Emily and Nikki and Yoga friends and Book group friends and books and wine.

So if you ask, How am I doing? My answer today is:

I’m not feeling particularly inspired these days but I am feeling grateful that everyone in my immediate family is healthy. *Fingers crossed*

Now I want to know: 

How are you doing?