Posted in Gratitude

The Courage to Appear Weak

Today is December 1st and I did my ashtanga practice this morning for the first time since my injury almost a month ago.

It wasn’t perfect, but it felt soooo gooood.  I found myself being much kinder to myself, finding my inability to do certain things interesting rather than maddening.

When I got home from the studio I ate a soft boiled egg and a piece of toast and put a sticker on my calendar.

I am hoping to build a new streak beginning today.  It never really launched when I started it last month.  The injury shut it down at day 6.

As I am writing this, I am watching The Biggest Loser. It’s the episode where the contestants run a marathon.  One guy in particular (Danny) is really suffering, but he is pushing through.

I know all this suffering  is supposed to be “noble,”  but I don’t know.

I am not willing to be injured anymore.  I am not willing to learn patience and sit the sidelines while healing takes place.

From now on I will use caution, even if that means I appear timid or weak.  I have the courage to appear weak.

I want every day, every hour of my life to be healthy and productive.  I don’t want to wait around for my cells to regenerate, even if I know they will.

It feels so good to be healthy and pain free again!

Author:

I’m a small town yoga teacher who says motherfucker a lot. I hate anything woo. I’m into neuroscience. And facts. I’ll lead the chanting of “om” sometimes, but it makes me feel awkward. I want to access flow states. As far as yoga helps me do that, I’m into it. Dopamine is my fave neurotransmitter. Don’t tell anyone I told you this.

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