In Loving Silence

Today we (G and I) attended a brunch to celebrate the new marriage and the the 30 year anniversary of two of our best friends, Zee and Marty. The food was delicious, the company was sparkling, but what touched me the most about the whole day (and so many things touched me) was when Zee asked us all (about 16 guests) to join hands and share a moment of silence with them.

When Zee and Marty got married at the courthouse in Ithaca after New York sanctioned gay marriage, they took their vows in silence.  And then again today, after expressing her love for all of us in attendance, she asked us all to stand in silence together.

In that silence, happy tears fell from many eyes.  It was a moment of holiness, and deep intimacy.  (Zee starts all of her writing circles at Emma’s with a minute or two of silence, too, so it felt like being home.)

At most weddings, I feel snarky.  I think: “What are the odds that this will last?”  A wedding is just the beginning.  Everything is easy in the beginning.  It’s a whole different situation to stand in silence with two people who have weathered the storms of thirty years and still look at each other with love and perfect devotion.

Today I felt honored to stand in such loving silence.

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